The club's proposal to make ian payne a saint
Letter to the archbishop of Southwark
Resume of Mr. Ian Payne
Résumé of Mr. Ian R. Payne (seen here on the left)
26 Sandy Mount
Early years: Supportive younger brother and diligent son
Formative years: Southborough (not RC but we are all one faith in the eyes of our maker) Primary School pupil at Maidstone Grammar School – Prefect
Member of the Kent Youth Orchestra – Double Bass
(Note: At school, (we went to school together) I could only offer the eerie notes from the “Jaws” soundtrack, Ian could find uses for all the strings, but as you can imagine, in Kent, there was not much opposition to Double Bass playing when you are 16, but let’s just say, he made the first team.)
Student at the University of Birmingham – Geology and Mechanical Engineering (hons)
This was the beginning of the life-long love affair with the spade and all things associated with digging.
Relationships: There has been only one relationship that has dominated, the one that eventually resulted in the life-long marriage to Gillian (née Baker). Now, Gillian has many virtuous qualities, but the phrase “to try the patience of a saint” seems most apt in this case.
Offspring: Ian has two beautiful daughters Sophie (28) and Lydia (25)
Career: Ian had been loyal to the one company, which has been known by various names, currently the international firm Jacobs plc. He has been able to hold down several esteemed posts within this company, because, for example, one of his many skills extends to being able to drive along a road, and as it rises and falls, identify the sub-soil structure at 50 mph. (“…upper greensand, gault, lower greensand, Wealden clay, Hastings beds…” is a particular party-piece along the roller-coaster road that is Seven Mile Lane, Borough Green).
Latterly, Ian has taken his talents to Network Rail, where he is literally “shoring up the tracks”.
Relaxation: The other major part of Ian’s life is his relationship with West Farleigh Sports Club. When I first introduced him as the school’s goalkeeper, he won the players’ player of the year award as a rookie, then repeated the feat as a rookie midfield talisman (this galls many of his teammates somewhat, even to this day). It is unheard of for a goalkeeper to say “I think I can’t offer something more on the pitch”, and turns out to be true.
After 41 years as a player, Ian has finally ‘hung up his boots’ from the Veteran’s section, and stepped down from his role as the Club Secretary.
During his tenure, Ian had been; instrumental in the twinning of the villages of West Farleigh and of Ringstedt in northern Germany (the liaison between the two villages is now in its 30th year and has resulted in scores and scores of exchange and goodwill visits over the decades),
and in 2009 Ian, almost single-handedly, took it upon himself to find the support required to finance a state-of-the-art changing facility for the footballers, in a climate (post 2008) that could not have been more difficult – but he did.
Ian was (not now) a devotee of Rolf Harris, but unless the Pope asks, I feel we should keep this part of his private life, private.